17: My nights were spent in the company of many friends doing crazy things.
26: My nights are spent cleaning/working on art/falling asleep on my couch while watching t.v.
17: I worked two jobs, I got out of work anywhere between 11 pm to 2 am and still made it to work at my second job at 6 am without any complications.
26: I hit the snooze button on my alarm for at least two hours before I have to actually wake up.
17: My idea of a good time was driving cars recklessly fast in places that you aren't suppose to.
26: My idea of a good time is staying in and cooking.
17: Sleep was a thing that I got only when there wasn't anything else to do.
26: If I don't get sleep I am angry.
17: My room was always a mess
26: Bitches you can eat off my floor
17: Cooking was for women that were old, married, and had children.
26: Cooking is one of the best past times of all time.
17: Quitting smoking was a matter of just realizing I didn't want to anymore
26: Ahhhh.... I should quit but.... why?
17: I was a sexy beast.
26: I am now a sweaty beast.
17: My boobs were perfect.
26: My boobs are... well.... not 17 year old boobs.
The point is there are a lot of changes between being young and being... not so young. But I think the one that I am most depressed about is my will power.
I mean... I worked two jobs and still found time to have a good time.
I could do anything that I set my mind to.
I had will power.
Now it may seem that I am rambling or merely complaining but I really had to make this point before I told the story that I am about to tell.
So, I am trying to get healthier, and trying to get in better shape. So I decided the best first start was to do a cleanse.
The cleanse consists of eating nothing but a carefully constucted soup for three weeks, no drinking, and no processed sugar.... easy right? Well.... not so much.
I went shopping and bought all of the ingrediants to make this soup. I was so excited as I was making it. It smelled AMAZING. I was really proud of myself for actually taking the step to better my physical health. I was doing good.
So day 1, I ate the soup which was really good. I was still really pumped about this whole thing. It was exactly what my body needed. Part way through day 1 I started to get hungry.... in fact it felt as if I hadn't ate all day.... I was DYING..... So.... I went and bought McDonalds. Yea... okay I can start tomorrow. I will remember to bring soup to work with me for those cravings during the day.
Day 2 which is really supposed to be day one since I completely failed at day 1 originally. I got up early, I meditated, I ate soup, I went to work, and then I got home. And realized that there were four completely ice cold beers in my refrigerator... and they looked gooooooood. I think I opened my refrigerator about twenty times before finally caving and grabbing one. And the first taste of that ice cold beer was so amazing and fulfilling.... I didn't even feel guilty.
So... I guess Day 3 will be starting Day 1 all over again. At least age hasn't allowed me to give up on trying. But... like I said... willpower... WHERE HAS IT GONE?????
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