Everyone is terrified of something... or some things.... it's life.
As children we are afraid of the boogey man, the creatures that lurk under our beds, thunder storms, maybe creepy clowns.... it's natural right?
I think I was the most unafraid child in the world.
As an adult.... I seem to have learned to be afraid of everything.
I was in a horrible car accident with my older sister when I was only 14 years old.... a car accident that we were lucky to walk away from. It took me a while before I could even be in a car without being terrified let alone how long it took for me to get my license. But I managed.
Every guy in my life told me that they loved me and they would forever... then abandoned me the moment things got hard. I swore I would never let myself trust someone enough to marry them. And yet after a while somehow I got over it and I got married (granted that one didn't work out so well).
I was in a car accident while I was driving in the snow, everytime after that for a while I was terrified of driving when the roads were covered in snow and ice. I would be so tense.... but somehow... one day... I was over it.
I am still terrified of spiders. I HATE THEM!!!!!! They freak me out beyond all reason. But one morning when one was on my wall... I killed it. I still hate them but I can deal with it.
Tomorrow morning I have to stand up in front of everyone I work with and give a little speech. The moment I was told I had to do this I felt like throwing up. I am sooooo not good with public speaking. Sure I have worked with these people for a while. I talk to them every day..... and yet the idea of being on the spot, and speaking to all of them at once FREAKS ME OUT!!!!!!! I hate it.
I tried to get out of it, I mentioned my horrible fear of it, I mentioned the fact that I am not good at it, and finally I had to accept that tomorrow I have to do it.
FML!!!!!! I am panicking right now just thinking about it.
It's silly I know... and part of me is laughing at myself for the stupidity of it. I am kinda hoping this works out the same way that everything else has. Tomorrow I could wake up, go in there, and just do it. And be fine.
I am really hoping I don't freak out and just babble like an idiot.
Wish me luck.
That's nothing. The other day I had to go to bed knowing that I had to wake up, go to work, and have a 'talk' with my manager cuz I wasn't getting along with a temp manager. I hate awkwardness more than life itself. So I feel ya. But then it happens, you get over it, and you laugh about it later. Say-la-vee!
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